WHMPC - Uni-basher

So it's been quite some time since I blogged. I have been busy at work, out travelling a little bit, sick, nurturing first date relationships, going on first dates. You know, it's not easy being me ;o)

A few weeks ago, I got a message on the dreaded online dating website from a faceless suitor. I call him faceless because his profile didn't have a picture. Still a little on the charming side, he and I exchanged a few messages on the site (like emails) before he sent a pic. And surprisingly, he wasn't bad looking.

We began texting, MSNing and even talking on the phone. After about 5-6 days of doing so, we met up on a Saturday night for a walk. He was relaxed and not overly dressed (he'd been out at a pub with friends for drinks just before our impromptu meeting). We went for a walk down by the Rowing Club and sat and talked. Over the course of the half hour we were there, he was rather touchy but you know, nothing inappropriate. Then, somehow we got onto the conversation of universities and colleges and he says...

'Universities don't do a good job of preparing students for real life afterwards. They're definitely not as good as colleges'

(insert record scratch)

Um, say what? Do you know who you're talking to? So we had the debate of the purpose of a university versus the purpose of a college and finally I ended the conversation but I could tell that he wasn't convinced and I was less than impressed. However, he seemed like a nice enough guy and I continued to talk to him over the course of the following week with date plans for that Friday to go see the 67's play.

Come Friday, he picks me up at my house and we head to the game. But it's raining. And, besides driving slower than my GRANDMOTHER, he also seemed allergic to using his windshield wipers. I'm a bit of a passenger seat driver (le ex couldn't find his way out of a wet paper bag and his driving observations of other motorists were also lacking at times) so I can't handle when I can't see out of the windshield and if for only the simple reason as the wipers aren't being used, forget working, well that just annoys the crap outta me.

We get to the game and while sitting at the game, he tells me stories of his life to try and show me how popular he is with his friends ('I'm the good guy everyone likes!'), how smart he is ('I'm someone people turn to when they need advice on things') etc. Now, granted, none of these stories were overly showoffy, just by then, I was starting toget annoyed but only because he kept touching me.

Now, I'm a very affectionate person with my mate and with my nephews. After that, I sort of get a little uncomfortable if my friends and family are overly touchy, the French try and kiss my cheeks, or people are just touchy with me. I'm an awkward anglo, I get and accept that.

Throughout the game, when there was a lull in the action or the conversation, he was constantly shoulder checking me. Like bumping in to me. It got to the point where I started to get really angry about it. As the game was finishing, we ran into a group of his friends. By this point, I know he's not getting a 3rd chance but all I can say is AWK-WARD as his friends sit there and scope me out and give him those knowing smiles. Uggghhhhhh.

So we drive for an eternity to Preston street where he pokes me in the side ribs as we're walking into the restaurant. I'm sorry but my love handles don't like poking. Even if I didn't have them to protect my ribs, my ribs wouldn't like them. We have a somewhat awkward dinner (by that point I was REALLY just hungry and didn't even care who I was eating with) and he at several points grabbed my knee and gave it a squeeze under the table and also rubbed my forearm. I sat, when not eating, with my arms crossed. Did he know NOTHING about body language?

The second to final straw came at the end of the evening when he, I kid you not, body checked me as I was doing up my zipper when coming out of the restaurant. WTF? Is he 5?

He slowly drove me home and I don't remember much about the trip as I frantically tried to see out the windshield between every 10 minute concessional wipe. In the driveway, as my hand pulled on the lever to open the door, he says, 'what, I'm not even going to get a hug good-bye?'

Dude, if she hasn't been returning ANY of your physical touches throughout the course of the evening, GET. THE. HINT.

So I gave him his damn hug and got out of the car. 10 minutes later I had a text from him that was a :o(. I sent a ? back and he said 'nothing, just being a brat'. WTF, are you really 5? So then he texted me 'so, how did I do tonight on my do or die date?' (Earlier in the week I had told him that the 2nd date is do or die because you've had your chance to be nervous, etc. and now you really have to step up your a game.) Not wanting to crush him on the drive home - god knows how that would have affected his inability to drive - I texted back 'what, the jury doesn't even get a chance to deliberate overnight?' He left it at that and the next day texted me. I told him the truth, that we were just better off as friends and I didn't feel the chemistry to which he said he was thinking the same thing.

Ugh....right.....

And that was Friday night. Which was followed by Saturday....

PS - while I know as a Fit driver I really shouldn't, and I don't know a LOT about cars but I can't help but think that what you drive and the colour say a lot about your personality. And sorry, but I can't take someone seriously who drives a slate blue Sunfire. Well, any colour Sunfire for that matter...