I'm trying to get better at doing things around the house. I've had my blunders and my frantic/irritated/embarrassed/whiney phone calls to my brother/N when I couldn't figure something out over the last few months. But it's slowly getting better. I even own
I figured I'd pretty much had the whole drill thing figured out by now. I'd hung an accordian mirror in my bathroom, I'd drilled holes and taken out screws the previous owners had left in places (WTF?) and I'd even assembled a piece of Ikea furniture or two WITHOUT those hand-mutilating Allen keys they give you.
So, Saturday night I'm at home doing some drilling with my drill (yeah, I know...I'm at home on a Saturday night of a long weekend drilling and I wasn't even D&D - drinking and drilling). I get the pot lid rack taken down and hung up in the same cupboard as the pots (that's what happens when someone else drills before you unpack your kitchen on moving day) and was preparing to install a wire basket on rails into my lower cupboard to make my lazy life easier when reaching for the Saran Wrap or baggies or whatnot.
I start off figuring, "it's just pressboard, I can screw these screws in no problem" But I can't seem to get them very far in. At first I'm impressed at the durability of the pressboard, and then I figure "I'll show you pressboard, I'll drill holes and THEN screw in the screws". Can you hear the smug I'm-a-DIY-Goddess in my inside voice? So I get the right bit or whatever it's called into the drill and I'm drilling and drilling and drilling and I'm only getting in like a half centimeter. And then I kill my battery. So I figure, "well, it must have been the battery and that's why it wouldn't go in" so bring on a new battery! I put the other on the charger and get drilling. But still nothing.
Fuck this. I'm going to bed. I'm not even D&D on a Saturday night at home and I can't even get the second D right.
Sunday morning. I meet MH and R at Denny's for breakfast. R's going to fix my vents for me after we're done. On the car ride to my house, I'm telling MH about what happened. She chalks it up to a crappy drill and I'm thinking "yeah, that's right. It's a bad drill my brother picked out. Because I'm a DIY Goddess". When we get back to my house, R gets into my cupboard and takes a good look at my drill. He then says (through muffled chuckling)...
"Um, L, you had the drill in reverse"
I think these moments of brilliance and glory in my life will become a regular feature - of my life and my blog.
2 comments:
A saw! I have a saw, too! Like a reciprocating saw or whatever it's called. Look, it makes holes for kitty doors and I've seen my brother use it so why does it need an EXACT name. I can easily find it on the shelf again if I need to when talking to the Home Depot guys - that's good enough, non?
ha ha ha. HILARIOUS
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